Feeling sad or disappointed over a missed opportunity is not
something any of us enjoy. We like to think we are “take charge” people who
live life to the fullest.
In the past month Charles and I have attended memorial
services for two men who devoted their lives to church planting and spreading
the Gospel. They lived their lives fulfilling the mission that God had given
them. Their funerals were more like joyful celebrations.
Hospice nurse, Bronnie Ware is the author of the
best-selling memoir, The Top Five Regrets of the Dying – A Life Transformed by
the Dearly Departing. I recently saw a
post from her on Facebook entitled The
Top Five Regrets People Express on Their Deathbeds. She writes,
“For many years I
worked in palliative care. My patients were those who had gone home
to die. Some incredibly special times were shared. I was with them for the last three
to
twelve weeks of their lives. People grow a lot when they are faced with
their own mortality.”
Here are the five regrets she observed and paraphrased
by me.
#5 – I wish I’d let myself be happier by embracing the
moment and not being afraid of change.
#4 – I wish I had nurtured and maintained my relationships and
not given in to the time thief that kept me from doing important things with family and friends.
#3 – I wish I had had the courage to express my feelings. I spent too much time stuffing my feelings
and not speaking honestly.
#2 – I wish I had simplified my life and hadn’t worked so
hard amassing possessions.
#1 – I wish I had lived a life true to myself and done more
to fulfill my dreams.
When we lose our health, doing these five things is much
more difficult if not impossible. I
remember when I was so sick with liver disease and facing a transplant, all my
energy went into surviving each day. I did have regrets and unfulfilled dreams
(such as writing) and have been so thankful for a second chance to see my
dreams come true.
I will add one more to the list above—one that we can do
something about even when we are at the end of our life. When people are on
their death beds, their minds turn to where they will spend eternity. If they are not sure of their relationship
with God, that can cause a lot of anxiety and regrets. The good news is that it
is never too late to find a right relationship with God. He is always waiting
for us to come to Him, accept Jesus as our Savior, seek forgiveness for our sins,
and experience His grace. That simple act of faith will provide the peace, joy,
and love that comforts and grants life without regrets.
