Practice Thanks Living (Part 1)

Thanksgiving is one day or maybe a month during which we focus on feasting and being thankful.  Thanksgiving is also the first day of the holiday rush. I get so bogged down that by the time the holidays are over I’m worn out, and the idea of making New Year’s resolutions seems overwhelming. So this year I decided to determine my goals for 2016 early in connection with Thanksgiving.  My goal for 2016 is to practice Thanks Living. The following quote outlines the essence of Thanks Living.

“Yesterday is history, tomorrow is a mystery, today is a gift of God,

which is why we call it the present.” ― Bill Keane

Having the right perspective on yesterday, today, and tomorrow helps me practice Thanks Living. At first I thought I would put my ideas into one blog post but the more I thought and prayed about it, I decided to write three blogs dealing with what it means to experience Thanks Living.

Yesterday is History

What do we do with the past? We’ve all been through some tough times. We’ve been hurt by the actions of others. We’ve made some bad choices. Is it possible to make peace with our past? According to a youtube video called The Josh Speaks, the first step to dealing with the past is to remember it. In other words don’t stuff bad memories and paper over them with some addiction that only adds to your difficulties today. Don’t allow yourself to become a victim of your past.  Dwell on past events and wrongs and they grow bigger, more powerful, and destroy today’s potential for happiness. What you feed is what will grow.

Writing down past memories is very therapeutic. When I wrote my memoir Born Three Times, I examined my past in great detail. There were some things I enjoyed remembering and some painful experiences that I wanted to forget. But as I looked at the totality of my life, it became clear that the person I am today is the result of the good, bad, and ugly of the past. I saw how God has used all the details of my life to grow me in my Christian life. 

Is your past so painful you can’t overcome its negative effects? Consider getting the help of a friend or a professional that can help provide you with positive coping skills. Being able to put the past behind us is also good for our health. Carrying grudges or hurts leads to stress and high blood pressure, depression, anxiety, and other negative side effects that hurt our minds and bodies.

Learning how to forgive the past is also good for us spiritually. The Bible tells us how important it is for us to forgive.

“For if you forgive others their trespasses, your heavenly Father will also forgive you, but if you do not forgive others their trespasses, neither will your Father forgive your trespasses.” Matthew 6:14-15

Wow! I want to be forgiven by God, don’t you? I don’t want to have to give an account for every ugly word, or action, or thought I’ve had. So I must ask God to help me forgive those who hurt me in the past. We just recently cleaned out our bedroom closet. It had been way too long and the collection of dusty boxes and dust bunnies was a little overwhelming. It was also time to sort clothes and discard what no longer fit. Now that it’s done, I enjoy going into the closet to choose what to wear for the day. Forgiving the past is like cleaning out a dirty and dusty closet. You don’t like to stir things up, but once it is clean and you let stuff go, you find freedom.

“Freedom is what you do with what’s been done to you.” ~Jean Paul Sartre

Begin practicing Thanks Living this month as you prepare for the holiday season and stay tuned for my next blog post “Tomorrow is a Mystery.”  

A Box Full of Love

It’s not even November and some of us are already thinking about Christmas.  What’s the big rush you ask? It’s time to fill shoe boxes for Operation Christmas Child! Since 1993, the
Samaritan’s Purse project has collected and delivered more than 124 million gift-filled shoe

boxes to children in more than 150 countries and territories. These personalized shoe boxes filled with toys and gifts will go to children in some of the hardest-to-reach countries around the world.

Day after day on TV and the Internet, we see heart-wrenching pictures of children set adrift as refugees from war-torn countries. Also many families in Africa and Southeast Asia lack the basic necessities of life with little resources left to bring sunshine into a child’s life. We may not be able to personally go on a mission trip to help the world’s children, but we can support the work of Samaritan’s Purse in distributing shoe boxes to the neediest of them. 

Many senior adults in retirement communities and as individuals participate in this project. A recent internet video showed a 91-year-old woman sewing small tote bags to include in the boxes. Her goal for 2015 is to make 200 drawstrings bags. She wakes up with a purpose each and every day knowing that she is helping to bring joy to a child’s life.

What goes into a shoe box? The most popular items include a small doll, inflatable soccer ball, school supplies, hygiene items like toothbrushes and soap, flip-flops and socks. Non-chocolate candy, beads for girls, and flashlights for boys are much desired by children everywhere. A regular shoe box filled with items and wrapped in Christmas paper can be taken by November 23 to one of 4,000 drop-off sites in all 50 states. Operation Christmas Child also provides free pre-printed boxes for filling that are available at Christian bookstores.

Shoe boxes are flown to countries all over the world and distributed via boat, truck, and by mule into the remotest communities of people. The children and teenagers are then given an opportunity to take a class called “The Greatest Journey” that introduces them to God’s love through Jesus Christ. Lives are changed for eternity, as many receive the hope offered by the Gospel. And it all starts with a shoe box and a visit to your local dollar store.

More information on how you can help is found at the website: www.samaritanspurse.org/occ.

What Color is October?

Slow down and look around this October. Along with April, it is one of the most colorful months of the year.  No wonder fall and spring are favorite seasons for a lot of people.

The variety of colors everywhere has amazed me. Here’s a sample of what I have observed.

·        Leaves – The leaves are changing slowly in Georgia this year. Our first 40^o night time temperature arrives this weekend and will, hopefully, change the green leaves to yellow, red, purple, orange, and not just drab brown. I still miss my home town at this time of the year. It’s very hard to duplicate the beauty of a northern New York State fall.

·        Flowers – It was time to replace my spring flowers on our porch and deck. When I arrived at the garden center, my senses were assaulted by the display of fall flowers. The mums were yellow and bronze and everything in between.  But I knew they would not survive the first freeze, so I headed to the pansies. I chose the deep red and yellow ones. Their bright faces will keep me cheered during the cold and dreary winter.

·        Pumpkins – The color and variety of pumpkins has amazed me this year. Pumpkins and jack-o-lanterns are not just orange and round any more. White, green, and gold ones were stacked at the grocery store in a very appealing display.  Other vegetables such as squash and decorative gourds added to the color combo. Pumpkin bread anyone? Here’s a link to a Betty Crocker recipe. Enjoy!

http://www.bettycrocker.com/recipes/pumpkin-bread/9b9cb563-8f0c-4dd7-a1af-1e337eea64dc?mkwid=seVvAFu08_dc&pcrid=79321853456&gclid=CjwKEAjw1_KwBRDEz_WvncL4jGwSJAAEym0dJLk_IrMZv0GYtxx-ax9tYYJPrcTtYtWe8iL1omtw6hoCzlbw_wcB

·        Football – Here is Georgia everyone bleeds red and black for the University of Georgia Bulldogs and gold and black for the Georgia Tech Yellow Jackets. Fans of the Atlanta Falcons sport their red and white shirts and are thrilled with their winning record. I’m not a football fan myself, but I enjoy seeing others wear their team colors. 

 

·        Apples – On a recent trip to the apple barn in Ellijay, Georgia we sampled many types of apples. We snacked on everything from bright red delicious to green Granny Smith. As I type, I am chewing a slightly tart Pink Lady.

·        Pink – Speaking of pink, October is National Breast Cancer Awareness Month and pink is everywhere.  I have several friends who have overcome this tough disease. My prayers go out to all those receiving treatment. May they experience many more colorful October days.

                            Do you have some fall sights or memories to share? 

Please comment below. I love hearing from you.

30 Days Hath September

The first day of fall.

It’s a good thing I memorized the Mother Goose rhyme that helps me remember the number of days in each month. Knowing the rhyme has prompted me to write another post before Wednesday. Usually, I have an idea or two in the hopper for my bi-monthly blog, but this short month caught me short.  I don’t even know what happened to September except that I spent two weeks with a stomach virus followed by a cold, and here we are ready for October.

When I was a child, I loved the month of September because it meant going back to school. I was one of those weird kids who loved school—new teachers, books, friends, and opportunities. I’m sure school instilled my love for learning, reading, and writing. For me the first Tuesday of September when school resumed was more like the beginning of a new year than the traditional New Year’s Day on January 1. Since my school years were spent in Western New York State, the colorful leaves peaked and fell in September. Kicking and crunching the leaves as I walked to school was a favorite pastime.

Two songs I still enjoy include September in their titles. The 1959 song “See You in September” was a big hit when I was a teenager and wishing I had a summer love.  And who still doesn’t enjoy the very romantic song “September Morn” sung by Neil Diamond.  Here is some more September trivia:

Today, September 27 has been designated National Chocolate Milk Day, National Crush a Can Day, National Corn Beef Hash Day, and National Gold Star Mother’s Day (in recognition of mothers whose sons died on the battlefield.)


Now for the serious side of September. At the top of our list has to be our remembrances of 9/11. Where were you on that day?  We were on a tour group bus in the heart of France. We had pulled into a rest stop, and there in the corner was a small black & white TV showing grainy footage of the smoking twin towers. I first thought it was a replay of the old King Kong movie with the giant ape climbing up the Empire State Building. Everything was in French and nobody in the rest stop spoke English so our tour guide had to interpret for us. We were all in panic mode when we got back on the bus. It wasn’t until we got back into Germany that we could watch English speaking television. We weren’t sure when and if we could fly back to the US. On the return flight several days later everyone sang God Bless America when our wheels touched down at the Atlanta airport.

Even after 29 years, I sadly remember September 17, 1996. That was the day my first husband, Talmadge Davis, died of a sudden heart attack. Our family life changed forever. One week later my youngest son, Michael Davis, celebrated his 15th birthday. September memories are better these days because a grandson and granddaughter were also both born in this month. I am thankful everyday that God allows me to live and enjoy another beautiful September.

Old People's Music

The sounds of Frank Sinatra

I like the music sounds of previous decades—50’s, 60’s 70’s along with some more recent music too. The songs that used to croon about June, moon, and spoon and were accompanied by instruments were my favorites. When I finally figured out how to RIP my music to my computer, transfer the sings to my Kindle Fire HDX, and play them on my Bose Bluetooth speaker, I felt like I had arrived. I could listen to all my old favorites anyplace, anytime, anyhow.

Shirley and me ready for the
 Josh Groban concert

My granddaughter was helping clean up the kitchen after a recent meal I had cooked for my son and his children. We were having a real bonding time over the kitchen sink. Afterward I suggested we  sit down to watch a bit of TV. When I turned it on, the Public Broadcasting Channel came up with one of their quarterly fundraising events featuring a well-known singer of the past. Just as I was relaxing, my granddaughter jumped up and announced, “Grammy, that’s old people’s music,” and she flounced out of the room.

Oh my, I guess she was right. It didn’t impress her one bit that I know how to play my favorites on all the latest gadgets. And she probably wouldn’t be impressed if I told her about the wonderful time Charles and I had attending the Barry Manilow concert on our anniversary. Somehow she just couldn’t imagine her grandparents swinging and swaying to his music. Do I dare mention to her that a friend and I recently attended a Josh Groban concert and listened to his beautiful baritone voice sing Broadway hits from yesteryear?  

Charles and I recently watched another PBS program featuring Johnny Mathis along with the announcement of his upcoming concert in Atlanta in January. I looked at Charles and laughed, “More old people’s music.” He said,” If can still sing like that at his age, we need to get tickets.” Now to complete my concert bucket list for the year, I need to hear Michael Buble` sing all the oldies but goodies in the swing style of today. It just proves that what goes around comes around. 

When I’m alone and have some unpleasant household task to perform, I turn on my Kindle and speaker full blast and am transported to another place and time. Old People’s Music helps me feel young again.

The Pursuit of Happiness

Who doesn’t want to live a satisfying life?  Humans are complex and travel many different paths in life, but everyone is looking for meaning and purpose. We spend most of our time pursuing those things that make us happy. After all we’re Americans and isn’t that what Americans do? The Declaration of Independence gives full support to our desire to be happy.

We hold these truths to be self-evident, that all men are created equal, that they are endowed by their Creator with certain unalienable Rights, that among these are Life, Liberty and the                                    pursuit of Happiness.

 I found two internet articles on the subject of long-term happiness and the sense of well-being, which represent two sides of the same coin. The first article from the August 12, 2015 edition of The Week Magazine is entitled The Key to Sustained Happiness is Religion.  Researchers at the London School of Economics and Erasmus University Medical Center in the Netherlands studied various social activities that people chose to pursue.  They also looked at organizations that people join. Politics, Community Involvement, Charities, Education, and Religion were the areas that received the greatest scrutiny.

http://theweek.com/speedreads/571509/study-key-sustained-happiness-religion

The researchers discovered that every area they studied except religion led to decreased happiness over time. Only participation in a religious organization boosted happiness in the long run. The researchers said that they were puzzled by their discovery. 

The second article written by Scott Barry Kaufman on August 2, 2015 on the Scientific American Blog asks What Character Strengths are Most Predictive of Well-Being?  517 people ranging in age from 18-71 were studied to determine their positive strengths. The goal was to use this information in psychology to not just treat mental illness but to encourage people to focus on those positive strengths. Google:  Scientific American Well Being for article.

The characteristics that rose to the top in people who experienced well-being were: Gratitude, Love, Honesty, and Hope. I see a strong connection between participation in a religious organization and those characteristics. Believing in God and studying His Word with a group of like-minded believers will make us more thankful and honest. Stretching our faith muscles will develop a mindset of love and hope. 

Jesus also talked about a full and satisfying life as recorded in the Bible in John 10:10.

I am come that they might have life,

and that they might have it more abundantly.

Pursue happiness and a sense of well-being by investing your life in serving God and serving others. And I would love to hear from you. 

What makes you happy? 

Life Without Regrets

Feeling sad or disappointed over a missed opportunity is not something any of us enjoy. We like to think we are “take charge” people who live life to the fullest. 

In the past month Charles and I have attended memorial services for two men who devoted their lives to church planting and spreading the Gospel. They lived their lives fulfilling the mission that God had given them. Their funerals were more like joyful celebrations.

Hospice nurse, Bronnie Ware is the author of the best-selling memoir, The Top Five Regrets of the Dying – A Life Transformed by the Dearly Departing.  I recently saw a post from her on Facebook entitled The Top Five Regrets People Express on Their Deathbeds. She writes,

“For many years I worked in palliative care. My patients were those who had gone home

to die. Some incredibly special times were shared. I was with them for the last three to

         twelve weeks of their lives. People grow a lot when they are faced with their own mortality.”

Here are the five regrets she observed and paraphrased by me.

#5 – I wish I’d let myself be happier by embracing the moment and not being afraid of change.

#4 – I wish I had nurtured and maintained my relationships and not given in to the time thief that kept me from doing important things with family and friends.

#3 – I wish I had had the courage to express my feelings. I spent too much time stuffing my feelings and not speaking honestly.

#2 – I wish I had simplified my life and hadn’t worked so hard amassing possessions.

#1 – I wish I had lived a life true to myself and done more to fulfill my dreams.

When we lose our health, doing these five things is much more difficult if not impossible. I remember when I was so sick with liver disease and facing a transplant, all my energy went into surviving each day. I did have regrets and unfulfilled dreams (such as writing) and have been so thankful for a second chance to see my dreams come true.

I will add one more to the list above—one that we can do something about even when we are at the end of our life. When people are on their death beds, their minds turn to where they will spend eternity. If they are not sure of their relationship with God, that can cause a lot of anxiety and regrets. The good news is that it is never too late to find a right relationship with God. He is always waiting for us to come to Him, accept Jesus as our Savior, seek forgiveness for our sins, and experience His grace. That simple act of faith will provide the peace, joy, and love that comforts and grants life without regrets.